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Culture of Rear Ends??!!..

"Rest assured, we will never exchange our culture for your culture; the culture of rear ends."  F.A.

Only the ones who have stainless and thick steel skulls housing a peanut for a brain can describe the majority and most successful -technologically and humanly- inhabitants of this earth with such label...mind you friends, they claim to be PhD holders of some sort, authors, scholars, educators, religious and individuals who, you might expect, should ooze civility in their writings, instead, nose first, they dive into...oh well, see the title of this piece. They even go further and call others crows – like as if the "others" do nothing but nibble on road kills day in and day out. I have to admit, I spent little time pondering, not so much on what the heck "culture of rear ends" is, but why did this "scholar" use it? So, after slapping my fifths with my sixths, I came up with an explanation that sure satisfied my free and wondering brain cells.

Ruling out the sense of smell, or lack of it in this case, is the culprit and everything else considered, I ask you, dear reader, to excuse me for wanderring a bit too far in my imagination on what makes this blubber tick:

The star of my tale, my friend, is a hunchback. Why did I choose a hunchback? Read on:

Our hunchback spends a great deal of his time in a little corner down in his basement –a dungeon he proudly architected for himself long ago. The wife, wrestling with 3 girls and 4 boys, ranging in age from 11 to 21 years, peeks to check on him. She never forgets to thank him again for allowing her to see the sun a few weeks ago. She occasionally informs him with what she needs in order to fill his belly in which he runs out for it. Our Hunchback and his family are living in an inner city somewhere in central USA. With the exception of their 3 older boys, who are allowed to get out of the house and chase the opposite sex of their or any age, the family keeps very much to themselves. To go food shopping for the family, the father hunchy has to make at least one trip per day to the nearby grocery store.

Observant that he is, he gets all his "rear-end-culture" from that short shopping trip. Out of his small street and as soon as he e-la-‘awaS right into the main strip, he passes by a couple of call ladies, a gogo girls establishment (strip tease), two bars -one of them caters to guy and lesbian gatherings, and a homeless man lying down on a cardboard with a half-empty bottle of booze. Across the street he scans his favorite billboard – he credits this billboard for adding the only spice in his life; the billboard has a racecar driver advertising for Viagra in which he refills every two months. He goes into the grocery store and gets both hands loaded. He heads back and he does it rather quick. Now, the load of the grocery bags adds stooping to the already arched back... yap! You guessed it. Our hunchback inadvertently puts his nose in the same level as others' rear ends ...and from there the knowledge of his surroundings pours in...wow, what a gold mine?! Our hunchback is convinced, and no hope in changing him, that the entire country is exact but large version of his street. As to his labeling others "crows", my free and wondering brain cells are still trying to come up with a reasonable answer and they will...unless you, dear reader, can think of some and be kind to share it with us.

See how easy one can get into that kind of demeaning and trashy talk ya see-at-it al-dactoor. No doubt, and you know it well, it’s a challenge to communicate to others, who might hold opposing views to yours, with civility, respect, good manners, and most importantly free of insults and name-calling! Please, live-up to your credentials. Let us read your offerings and enjoy them free of street talk. This also goes to the noisy Chihuahuas, who became unleashed by your empty article and who declared their daggers on Hakeem. You folks do more harm, in my views, to Islam than Islam's avid critics do.

Lastly, while I did not touch on the core subject that was started by Dr. Fathi Alfadheli, replied to by Hakeem, and hacked away by few others, you, the reader, may have wondered where do I stand on the said subject, I hereby satisfy your curiosity. My views/believes are:

1- All religions are good schools and are indeed man made. Why do I believe they are man made? No one can sell me a convincing explanation on why there is so much injustice for the undeserving on this earth and in front of our merciful Almighty's eyes while He/She is vacationing in the 7th sky.
2- Once its put under the lenses of a dissecting microscope, all religions can and will fall apart – Islam is no different.
3- God bless that illiterate ebdae-wee, my hero, who came to prophet Muhammed (sAaws) while the prophet was on his death bed and asked: "I am confused, make it simple ya Daweel alo'mmer for me..what is adeeen?"... "Adeeen almu'amala" Muhamed answered -likely were his last words to seal the prophecy. This answer, my friends, is my guide in life and, for decades, proved to be a rewarding path for me and for my children as well.
4- While I respect my people's faith and what was once mine too, or any faith for that matter, Islam in particular needs some rework.... example: people who deny the basic equality to more than half of their own, women, can hardly keep up with world/time changes –any or all changes.

Al-'Eryan
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- There are silent readers who share Hakeems, Fawzi A. and many others views on this subject but fear the uncivil exchange of words.
- It was once wished of our writer to do without name calling when he used the same trashy talk on Fawzi Al'orfia. I would like to ask him once again, to please refrain from such practice.


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